Friday, 26 July 2013

the Big bad wolf and the 3 little pigs

Once upon  a time there were 3 little pigs and being of an
unscrupulous mind, they decided to build and rent out substandard

Now the first little pig decided to build his house of straw as he had
a contact in the farming  industry, and he would let him have some
straw cheap.   So the first pig built this house and advertised it as
a "Charming Rustic Thatched Cottage".  But when the first applicants,
who were first time buyers, signed the mortgage and rent agreement
before seeing this property.

When these new home owners saw that it was just made of straw, they
immediately went to the Planning department to complain about the
house, and saw a very nice  person there named B  B Wolf.

Who went to visit and saw the substandard building materials,  put an
injunction to stop the first pig plc from ever building again and B B
Wolf condemned the property and it was demolished

The first little pig, then being annoyed went to his brother the
second little pig who also had a construction company and got a job
with him  Second Little Pig plc.

He also had contacts but  this time in the forestry industry who sold
the Second little pig some protected trees and so build some out of
wood.  He too had a sideline in providing mortgages.

The second little pig , after advertising the properties as a totally
Green House, ecologically friendly put up the price of this property.
So he could sell it to some pretentious Yuppies.  And lo and behold it
sold along with others not yet built.  .   After deciding that it
wasn't worth building anymore, he then sold more houses in a time
share scam and when the "Green" house developed woodworm the new
owners tried to take the second little pig  to Court citing     unsafe
building.  Unfortunately, the Judge was a friend of the pigs and
accepted a backhander from them to throw the case out.   One again B B
Wolf the Building Inspector condemned the house and banned Second
Little Pig from ever being a director of any company again.

Now the Third little pig was annoyed at the B B Wolf an the problems
that his 2 younger brothers were in.  Decided to take revenge and
asked for Planning Permission and a Review of Building Practices,from
B  B wolf.   They had hidden the fact it was the 2 little pigs by
setting up a holding company in the Isle of Mann called TLP Ltd.  So B
 B Wolf arrived to inspect the new premises.  He was shown the
building including the basement which was just   getting poured with
concrete.  As the Wolf went down the steps the first and second little
pig tripped him up and sent him down into the new concrete basement
and filled it in while B  B Wolf was alive.

And that was the end of the Big Bad Wolf.

And the TLP (the three little pigs) Limited made a fortune selling bad homes

The day the world changed

Chapter 1

For the first time that day, George went to the alcove and inputted his personal id number, then inserted his id card, then had to submit to the usual retina and dna scan. It was a routine now 4 times a day he would go and get scanned to prove that they werent a burden to the state. Each time the laser ran over his eye George shuddered, thinking how the world has changed in so short a time. Once again he passed his burden test, but this time it seemed to take longer which was odd since they were all controlled by the central register. As he sat waiting for the data to be read out, he thought why would they be slow accessing. He smiled as his data was read out he had passed the daily task list, one more day alive, but the cynical part of him said hang on, if something good happened now, that means something bad would happen later. As usual his cynical outlook was prooved to be correct.

“George number 876, 213 B. your work quota has been increased, you will be transferred to the central register, for reprocessing. All hail the state, they who feed you, clothe you, protect you. You will report for processing tomorrow at 11 am.”

The fear on Georges eye, was pleasurable to the guard, a petty little sadist, who enjoyed seeing the fear and hate in their eyes. She was young had only just joined the state guardians, but already she loved the brutality of it. Her name was josephine but to her co workers she was Jo, she didn’t have any friends, but she didn’t want any brutality was her lover, she had dallied with a few other lady guards, but nothing came of them.

Jo noticed him sitting there in numb terror, and wondered who he was, then decided he wasn’t worth the thought, who cares who he was, he was a man, and a B worker, someone who did all the worst kind of jobs, she then had a thought I will have some fun with him. So after George had sat there for 5 minutes as required by law Jo removed her nite stick and ran the stick over his neck, loving the sight, of his cringing at the touch of the hard black metal on his throat, this was why she loved her job,making men suffer it was almost as good as sex, but almost. She ran the stick over his throat pushing it harder and harder so he couldn’t breathe, and stilll he didn’t move, this wasn’t right he should be pleading with her to stop, and she knew that she wouldn’t.

George sat there feeling the stick slide across his throat, but he used one of his tricks something that not even the register knew about, it was his secret weapon, he could go away, pull his conciousness inwards until he became an observer in his own body to the degradation that he had to endure since the State had taken control over all of their lives. He knew she couldn’t keep him here for more than 15 minutes before being called to account so all he had to do was wait and he will be free, at least till the next time he had to get scanned. Jo decided to increase the force damn she thought he isnt doing it, he should be crying in pain. Jo moved the stick lower down his fat greasy body, deciding that as a man the pain of the stick being pushed into his groin would make anyman scream in pain, she was anticipating the near sexual thrill she got from punishing men for being men. She was totally caught up in the feeling of power that she never noticed the light blinking on the panel stating the next person was waiting, 15 minutes, 16 minutes, 17, the light flashed faster. Then with a feeling of terror Jo realised oh no I am late , I should have gotten rid of him 4 minutes ago, she will be punished for this. This MAN this lesser being he caused her to be a burden on the state.. “ go on George 876213B, go and don’t be a burden to the state” she shouted but her heart wasn’t in it.

George walked out of the cubicle with relief, he had made it, she was the worst guard yet, it seemed that most of the guards were women nowadays, and their brutality was increasing, it was not unknown for these amazonian nazi’s to even beat people up, it was even known that they would kill. As George walked down the corridor he noticed the head guard Adrian Lancaine, someone he had known in the life before the State or B.S. as it was known, come racing down the corridor looking furious, George couldn’t help but smile, yes someone is in trouble.. as the head guard entered the room he saw Jo who was his best guard sitting on the chair with her head in her hands, and knew that she had once again let her emotions cloud her duty to the state, but this time he couldn’t hide the evidence. “Whats happening?” george stormed at her, “have you lost what sense u were born with, or are you trying to kill me? Come on ANSWER me.” jo looked shocked at this outburst, she was his golden girl, the best at control “ it wasn’t my fault, he ..he kept looking at me, please don’t report me” jo whimpered , feeling shame at how she had to become subservient to a mere man. Adrian looked at her and saw something had changed in here, gone was her superior attitude, and a vulnerability had replaced it, and knew she would not be a guard again and shook his head. Jo saw this and shuddered oh god I am going to be a burden to the state, all because of that MAN, that fat slob of a man, a man who deserved to die, not for being a burden but for being a MAN. While these thoughts were going through jo’s mind, Adrian saw a different light enter her eyes, and he became scared, she had lost her mind.

Adrian checked the system register for who could have caused this change, it was odd george wasn’t the kind of person to do this, but then again Adrian realised there were things in his record that didn’t make sense, and he wondered who’s idea was it for a computer controlled register, computers don’t think they don’t reason, facts are facts.. George was a inoffensive person, as far as Adrian could see, but then recalled his face “I know him” he cried, “he was always a weird person, a thinker an enemy of the state for that alone”

Jo looked up at those words, and asked Adrian “you knew him? How, Why, Where?”, Adrian answered unconciously as he went back over his past, “ oh I saw him around, he had a sort of confidence about him, as if he wasn’t supposed to be here, he was just different, I hated him the moment I saw him, he could have been so much more than a “burden the the state”” Adrian said with deep sarcasm” but at least now he wont be, so what were you doing to him, Jo, not torturing him were you, you remember what happened to michael 765, 908 C, and the trouble I had covering that up.” Jo remembered the feeling of blood on here hands the feel of it, it was glorious, but all she did was nod.

Adrian thought what can I do with her, she alienates all the other guards, she hates all men, if I was of a nasty mind I would send her to work in the pregnancy camps, that would change her, being forced to have multiple babies, but then remembering a conversation with the head of the security services, about a new core group of expendable, stone cold killers who would be sent out to eliminate enemies of the state, and thought that’s an idea, it’s a promotion, and she would owe me big time, and still get her out from my group..yes I will have a word, “ ok Jo, go home, and wait, we shall see what happens,” Adrian loved this little terror he could inflict on people. Jo looked up in fear, was I a burden, please no, and for the first time in 5 years she prayed, I don’t want to be sent to the baby farm, to have all those sweaty men on me, the thought nearly made her throw up, but this was the fate of women who where burdens to the state, and part of her agreed women who were a burden should repay the state by having children, but it was she realised a different thing when it was her. Jo went home to her house, and sat there contemplating her future, she knew that a few traitors had made a home in the vaults but she rebelled at the thought of them of sharing their lives and losing her power to terrorise.

Chapter 2

george walked to the factory, his job for the next 4 hours, 4 hours of work, then another scan , then 4 more hours, 16 hours work today, then sleep, then a meeting in central control, he hoped they hadnt found his secret stash of subversive books, “subversive” he muttered, then realising he had said it out loud, looked round incase the watchers had noticed, luckily they hadnt and sighed in relief, thought police, sadistic security guards, and he went back to his subversive books, it was mad, in 5 short years, 99% of all books where locked up, or burnt at that thought george felt something like sorrow, all that lost knowledge, all the good it could have done. But its gotten so people cant think, thinking back over the incident with the guard, it seemed to him that more sadists where coming out, it was terrifying, they must have only been 17 when the first words were uttered, he still remembered them, “Don’t be a burden to the state, work for the state, live happy for the state” it made him sick, but it’s the world he lives in now, you had to be a profitable member of society, your costs must never outweigh what you earn, george smiled grimly, at least the credit card people were out of business, they never expected what happened. It was the first year after the State came into effect they had slowly taken power, bringing the rich and powerful over to their side, why should the rich pay for the burdens that the lesser people put on us, you will be the uber class, the leaders of the new State. And they were fools to believe them, but then the rich were always known to be fools.

The credit card companies, followed the party line, we will help the defaulters onloans, we will put them to work, and get your money back, al we need is some capital we have all these rich people on our side, we just need you, what a crock it was, 6 months later all the credit card companies were abolished, the executives sent to work in the camps, all assets, confiscated for the State. That was clever, get them to pay for their own destruction. Then confiscate the property, george had to admire that piece of theft. Then came the gradual, curtailing of rights, the introducing of id cards, then retina scans, dna scans, until there was nothing you could do without proof of your identity, then the addition of making people work for the good of the state. You had to show that you could provide a service to be allowed to live and love. George was miles away and he nearly walked past his employment, hah employment, all he did everyday was check the standard of certain items, then someone checked my work, and so on, for as soon as you discovered that you were a burden, you would vanish.

It was clever george had to admit, but it was a grudging admiration, so another 4 hours of work, then yet another meeting, you cant have people doing work or getting someone who is on a break to substitute for you, spot checks of identity, this is a wonderful new world, at least the rich are no longer around, another group of people, sent to the camps, and as usual all property confiscated, the state was THE richest group around, and the most powerful. Everything was now focused on the good of the state, if you were a woman you would be sent to the baby farms, breeding the next generation of mindless drones, followers of the state, men were not sent to the baby farms only the uber classes could have kids and often. George remembered one of his friends suddenly disappearing in the middle of the night and anyone who spoke up they vanished as well. George found a way to work and yet go back into his own past, he did this every time at work it was the best way to cope.

Tom Thumb Updated

There was once a poor peasant, and his wife, who was sat in front of the fire, the poor peasant hatched an idea, we shall have a child, and live off the money the government gives us, and not give the child anything much to eat. The wife hearing this agreed, and said, "Yes, even if we had only one, and it were quite small, and only as big as a thumb, I should be quite satisfied, and we could get more money for a disabled child of tiny size."

Now it so happened that the woman fell ill, and after seven months gave birth to a child, that was perfect for their purposes, but no longer than a thumb. Then said they, "It is as we wished it to be, and it shall be our dear child." Rubbing their greedy little hands together And because of its size, they called it Tom Thumb. Making fun of it, the child did not grow taller, but remained as it had been at the first for the parents didn’t feed it enough, just enough so that the child services would be satisfied. The parents of the midget Tom, claimed for everything they could for themselves, but even this wasn’t enough.

One day the peasant was getting ready to go into the forest to cut wood, when he said as if to himself, "How I wish that there was someone who would bring the cart to me." Waiting for Tom to offer to work for his dad, and so have cheap labour as well as all the funding the government gave them.

"Oh father," cried Tom Thumb, "I will soon bring the cart, rely on that. It shall be in the forest at the appointed time." But tom had an ulterior motive, he could, being as small as he was, become a house thief, but tom had to bide his time, and let all the other people in the area know this “kind” lad of short stature.

Then while tom was working out how to best steal the coins of the village, he came across 2 men who ran a circus, and tom thought of a good idea, I will get my father to sell me to these two men, that way I can get some money, and I wont be noticed. Now knowing these two men, was around, tom made an awfully loud noise, and got these 2 men interested, and the came to the father then one of them took the other aside and said, "Listen, the little fellow would make our fortune if we exhibited him in a large town, for money. We will buy him." They went to the peasant and said, "Sell us the little man. He shall be well treated with us"

"No," replied the father, "he is the apple of my eye, and all the money in the world cannot buy him from me." Using this as a ploy to get even more money from them.

Tom Thumb, however, when he heard of the bargain, had crept up the folds of his father's coat, placed himself on his shoulder, and whispered in his ear, "Father do give me away, I will soon come back again." Then the father parted with him to the two men for a handsome sum of money. And tom made him promise to give tom his share..

After a while, tom had had enough of this, and so said he needed to rest, and the 2 gentlemen decided it was getting late, decided to rest too, and when the 2 men fell asleep, he crept about a little between the sods, and then he suddenly slipped into a mousehole which he had sought out. "Good evening, gentlemen, just go home without me," he cried to them, and mocked them. They ran thither and stuck their sticks into the mousehole, but it was all in vain. Tom Thumb crept still farther in, and as it soon became quite dark, they were forced to go home with their vexation and their empty purses. Tom was happy at this so he fell asleep hugging himself tightly,

Not long afterwards, when he was just going to sleep, he heard two men go by, and one of them was saying, "How shall we set about getting hold of the rich pastor's silver and gold?"
"I could tell you that," cried Tom Thumb, interrupting them.
"What was that?" said one of the thieves in fright, "I heard someone speaking."
They stood still listening, and Tom Thumb spoke again, and said, "Take me with you, and I'll help you."
"But where are you?"
"Just look on the ground, and observe from whence my voice comes," he replied.
There the thieves at length found him, and lifted him up. "You little imp, how will you help us?" they said.
"Listen," said he, "I will creep into the pastor's room through the iron bars, and will reach out to you whatever you want to have."

So Tom got a chance now to steal from the pastor, and to get away with it, so tom crept into the pastors house, and went to the safe, and started to remove the coins, and put them in a safe mousehole, for he had come up with that idea.. after a while, he decided he had got most of the money, but he now needed some scapegoats, so he managed to open the door, by climbing into the lock, and pushing the levers till it opened. And let in the 2 theives.. as soon as tom led them to the safe, he made a very loud noise, and woke up the pastor, who reached out and grabbed his gun, making sure the choirboy was still asleep. Crept down and saw the 2 theives, and shot them dead. And tom after hearing the pastor ran down the mouse hole with all the money, hugged himself an thought once again I have gotten away with it and murder too..

Now tom had a bit of a problem, how to get back home, but he came across the idea, I know, I will find someone to carry me, off back home, so he waited till he found the right person, which was the maid an innocent young woman, who was very religious, so tom made a cross and tied himself on it and replaced her own crucifix, and pretended to be the voice of god, and persuaded this poor woman, to take the loaf, and a big sack, out of the house, and away to the peasants cottage.. so after a day of travelling, he reached the cottage, which now had an extension, and a large SUV in front of it, so tom got the woman to drop the sack, and he climbed from the crucifix, and the maid then went to a nunnery, after the religious experience.

Tom Crept into the house, using his housebreaking skills, and discovered that they didn’t really care for him, and this got his anger up, and he decided they should be dealt with.. and so tom called child services and with the help of a good crooked lawyer, divorced his parents of grounds of child endangerment, slave trading, and fraud. And got his parents arrested, and tom lived in the house, all alone with a lot of money. But being the wastrel theif he was he spent most of his money on prostitutes, and drink, and to pay for it, he had to carry on being “sold” and breaking into houses until a special task force was set up in the area, who set up a sting,. Then they arrested tom, and charged him with 24 counts of breaking and entering, fraud, and sent him to prison, for a very long time. In the same cell block as his father, and they killed each other. Stone dead.

The end..

Little red riding Hood updated

Once upon a time, there was this little girl, who had brainwashed people into believing she was a perfect little girl, and she especially fooled her grandmother who, she was convinced was going to die soon and leave her all her stuff. One day the Grandmother, falling for the old I need this item to be fashionable, bought her a red cap, made of very expensive red velvet, and then from now she was called at least in public little red riding hood. One day her mother said to her, "Come, Little Red Riding Hood, here is a piece of cake and a bottle of wine. Take them to your grandmother, she is ill and weak, and they will do her good. Set out before it gets hot, and when you are going, walk nicely and quietly and do not run off the path, or you may fall and break the bottle, and then your grandmother will get nothing. And when you go into her room, don't forget to say, good-morning, and don't peep into every corner before you do it." I will take great care, said Little Red Riding Hood to her mother, and gave her hand on it. And promptly broke her word, as young as she was she liked to party, and a free bottle of wine, well, she wasn’t going to let that go to waste with her old soon to be dead grandmother..

As red was walking through the forest, she had an idea, I know since she lives so far into the woods, I can probably help her along, and she opened the bottle of wine and celebrated, remembering to “smash” the bottle after it was drunk. So red detoured to a pet shop, and bought a wolf, and took it with her, tormenting it, and hitting it with a stick to get it all angry and murderous. Towards all humans, so as red wandered, towards the grandmothers, she worked out her plans.. she planned to put the wolf into the house and let it eat poor grandma all up, but then she realised since there were big strapping woodcutters near her grans house, they could possibly save her..

As red got closer she heard the woodcutters, and sneaked by them, then red tied the wolf up, outside the house and hit the animal till it was insane in pain and anger. Then red went to the woodcutters, and show other red stuff that was bought for her by the grandmother, after a while the woodcutters fell asleep, and red could finally get on with getting rich.. so red went back to the house, by which time the wolf was foaming at the mouth, red knocked on the door, and got grandma to open it, as she did so , red ran inside and hit old grandma with an axe she had “borrowed” from the woodcutters, after making sure the grandma was dead, red, went all around the house, seeing what could be stolen, grandma’s jewellery, then finding the grandma’s will, did a little forgery, to make sure all her property came to red, then she pushed the wolf into the house with the semi decapitated women, and waited for the wolf to eat grandma all up.. then after filling himself on grandma, the wolf fell asleep.

Red, thought, hang on, what if someone remembers I bought a wolf, then hatched another plan, and red ran off to the woodcutters, and screamed and not in the same way as she had before, woke all the bug burly woodsmen up, and explained a wolf had killed her grandma. They all ran off to the house, and saw the wolf, asleep, and the woodsmen, went in with their big axes and chopped the poor innocent wolf to bits. Red being the mercenary girl she was, told the woodsmen to try to leave the wolf fur as intact as possible. As she thought a red hat wasn’t the real fashion statement she wanted now, so she got the wolf pelt and managed to get a tailor to make her a wolf skin coat and a fur hat.. now as red was rich, after murdering her grandma, and dressed in fine wolfskin, she wandered round the town, until one day, the local animal wildlife expert saw red in the rare white wolf skin coat, and knew it was from the very rare, white wolf, a nearly extinct species.. and did a little investigating, and discovered red had bought one, from some favours she gave to the animal shop owner.. then he discovered how coincidental it was that she happened to buy a wolf, the same day a wolf killed her grannie.. so the expert, had red arrested for animal cruelty, murder, forgery, and was promptly put in prison for the rest of her life..

The end..

My poems

my love, my life, my heart
where can i start?
by saying How much you mean to me,
by being there next to you
by holding your hand when your ill
by cheering you up when your down,

you are everything thats worthwhile
you are my sun, and stars, my smile
you make it worth waking up
my everything, let us be together
nothing doesnt matter
you are my one and only,
the heart that beats under my skin
beats for you, i live for you.

new poem

if the sight of me offends you,
then i shall pluck out your eyes
if my voice offends you,
then i shall fill your ears with red hot lead
if you tongue offends me,
then i shall rip it out of your mouth

poem 7

time is my enemy
trapped in an eternity
of loneliness and boredom
can anyone rescue me from
this time of nothing

the quiet time has ended
the enemies are at the gate
forcing, pleading begging
to justify their lives
yet to accept would be disaster

no one cares about the lost
we are hidden from the world
in a purgatory forced upon us
we endure, we still live
even if they destroy our souls

yet some of us fight
their pathetic beliefs
of a worthy existence
doing things we hate
the call is out

the enemy tries to call
yet it fails
in their place of loneliness
they cry their words
into the air

they know the truth
these enemies of reality
they say they understand
yet not believe
we know the truth

outdated items and thoughts
born in another age
no on knows the truth
apart from the lost
we carry on for to give in lies ruin

black hearts and black souls
all in a pretty package
yet the blackness remains
in their hearts
to justify themselves

our hearts call for revolution
yet we cant agree
our confidence has gone
we live day to day
without hope


call me Mr safe
call me friend
but they never call me lover
never do they say they want me
I am Mr safe
the loneliest kind of man
always there for you
I care and love too
yet Mr safe is always alone
my heart aches
no one knows

Call me Mr Safe
Calling me friend
They now call me brother
They always want someone else
I am Mr Safe
Tired of asking, tired of refusal
Alone again
Love will never be for me
Mr safe is always alone
My heart is cold
No one cares.

Call me Mr safe
Call me friend
Its not by my choice
That I hear those words
I am Mr Safe
Looking for a reason
To love in this world
Yet seeing no one caring
My heart no longer sings
The loneliness and solitude
No one sees

Call me Mr safe
Please don't call me friend once more
I wish to love again
Yet knowing I never will
I am Mr Safe
Let me be with you
Just once to show my love
But that isn't going to happen
Just to love and live
Yet my life is empty
No one hears

Call me Mr safe
Call me friend once more
If I cant love without you
Then I will wait
I am Mr safe
Till the day I die
I will adore you
Yet feeling my heart
Grow cold and still
I don't want to be alone
No one feels

poem new

the darkness consumes me
my loneliness is everything
I see life and love
yet never touch its beauty
I watch and wait
till the time I know will never come
I embrace the dark
my only lover
the loneliness is eternal

our hearts may beat as one
yet mine is dying
from the loneliness
watching others
living through them
loving through them
yet not being able to touch them
the beauty that fascinates and scares
I now need the loneliness and solitude
yet I hate it
the love I feel is gone
only nothing remains

poem 6

Your eyes glow in my heart
your very touch intoxicates
I feel your life within you
my heart wants to be with you
yet you are unobtainable
the beauty of my heart and eyes
time will wait till we grow old
and our friendship grows
until we find we are the missing one
in our lives and hearts

poem 5

the fire that burns in my heart is my love for thee
there is a hole in my soul where you should be
you face haunts my dreams where it dwells
your voice rings in my ears like the peeling of bells
the very touch of your hand sets my skin on fire

Love is eternal, love is essential, love is
all I want to feel on my lips is your tender kiss
for I shall lose my heart to you when you do
every moment away from you makes my heart ache
but I will take my time as I don't want to make a mistake

the darkness in my soul needs a bright light
you may be in my mind, heart and soul but I need you within my sight
at least once so I can speak all the things that my heart wants to say
if only I could be with you this moment this day
only you can douse the fire in my heart

without you my life seems dull
it has no colour for you are so beautiful
you bring vibrancy into my life when I talk to you
everything glows with my love for you
but only when you are near

say the word and I will be yours
no matter where in the land or shores
I need you my darling, my heart
just tell me when I may start
to worship you and your soul

poem 4

Dreams are the reality of the soul
The dream of my life is to love
When the heart aches that's the absence of love
one day out hearts will beat as one
soon our lives will be lived not alone

sharing, being, loving, holding

my life is empty without you
you make my heart sing and soar
each day I have begun to love you more
your beauty knows no limits or barriers
you are my heart carrier
my life my love my very being is yours

whenever I cry I know you are not near
my love for you is entirely clear
we shall love together in happiness

poem 3

in my life only you inspire me
my love for you is deep within
I celebrate my love for you as you can plainly see
your very presence has my heart in a spin
yet I have never seen your face
That doesn't seem to matter
for I know one day we will meet in that place
the place where I can show that you matter
I love and only want to be near
to my love that I hold so dear
time is killing me
love is spinning me
be mine my love for you are my world, my very being
my beauty of the soul

Poem 2

sitting in the darkness
crying tears that no one sees
making a mask for everyone to see
holding my heart sealed in a box
looking for someone
with the key to the locks
steel cold, heart ice
still crying in the dark
where no one sees

poem 1

Here i sit surrounded by people
feeling lonlier than ever
seeing their lives and loves
watching yet never taking part
it must be destiny to be alone
to never feel the touch of her face
to never feel her warmth..
to see her smile at another
when all i want is to be her lover

hansel and Gretel updated

Once upon a time, there was a woodcutter and his wife and they were so poor, they couldn’t afford birth control , and eventually 2 little leeches appeared as they do. Then in a flash of genius, and intelligence, the woodcutter’s wife (who suffered from post partum depression from the birth of the little leeches) decides to abandon the kids in a dark and lonely wood, leaving them with enough food for the kids to guzzle down, packs of candy, and, bottles of cola, and make it a day out, then we can leave them there in the woods and need never be bothered by them again, the woodcutter is unsure about this as his kids are a proof of his manhood., the wife repsonded, how are we to live while they, eat us out of house and home, and cause chaos and havoc with their noises and smells., and the cost of bringing them up, hearing all this and how he would have to stop drinking and having a boys night out, he agreed.

The 2 children eavesdropping on their parents for blackmail purposes, heard this, and then decided to sneak out, and report it to the social services, but while he was out he decided her could get more money if they really did vanish into the woods, so he crept about, picking up old soda cans they had left in their parents garden, and filled his pockets, and backpacks with them, then went back, and comforted his sister in the only way a southern man could, in the morning before their parents were awake, they slipped back into their own beds. And once again they managed to get back to their own beds, without being caught. The woodcutters wife, then told them to get up, and that they were going into the woods to kill a deer for their supper. So she gave them some bread to tide them over. Then hansel being a lazy kid slowed down, and started dropping cans of soda and crisp packets on the ground,

Now the woodcutter told the kids to remain where they were, but they wandered off as it was with kids, and once again they did what only a brother and sister could do in the deep south do.. and naturally exhausted they, fell asleep, and woke up in the dark and followed their own trash back home leaving it in place. Where they disturbed their parents, and totally ruined their night of romance.. the woodcutters wife was righteously annoyed at the kids, but the woodcutter was over joyed for he was a man again apparently.

The next week, after their parents had run out of food for the children had used blackmail and threatened to call child services, to get all stuff the little brats wanted, the woodcutters wife decided to do it again but this time take them further into the dark woods. The kids hearing this, rubbed their hands together in greed thinking we can get more, so hansel once again went outside but this time their garden was clean, due to a court order. So hansel couldn’t pick up any soda cans, and sweet wrappers, and he was angry and swore, silently as he was on probation and had a curfew.. he went in and comforted his sister again, and once again snuck back into his room before the woodcutters wife got up. Now the adults were in dire straights, they only could afford some packs of potato chips, so they gave a bag each to hansel and gretel, and as they walked hansel started eating the crisps, and making a whole mess of crumbs.. then once again their parents left them alone, and once again they comforted each other as only brothers and sisters know in the deep south.. hansel being somewhat of an idiot, thought he could follow the crumbs back home, but as with most moronic kids, he had forgotten there were birds in the forest as he had killed all the ones round his house with his BB gun. They couldn’t find their own way home, so they wandered the woods looking for a phone to report their bad parents but couldn’t find one (the narrator whispers it’s a forest moron, no phones)..

When it was about mid-day, they saw a beautiful snow-white bird sitting on a bough, which sang so delightfully that they stood still and listened to it. Then hansel threw a stone at it killing it stone dead. And saw a small track leading to a small house, hansel thought it was an easy house to break into, but as they came closer they saw that it was built of bread and covered with cakes, but that the windows were of clear sugar. "We will set to work on that," said Hansel rubbing his hands together, "and have a good meal. I will eat a bit of the roof, and you Gretel, can eat some of the window, it will taste sweet.", and Gretel smashed the panes of glass and started scoffing them like the greedy little pig she was
Then a soft voice cried from the parlor:
"Nibble, nibble, gnaw,
Who is nibbling at my little house?"
The children answered:
"The wind, the wind,
The heaven-born wind,"
and went on eating without disturbing themselves. Once again showing how greedy and how selfish they were, Hansel, who liked the taste of the roof, tore down a great piece of it, and Gretel pushed out the whole of one round window-pane, sat down, and enjoyed herself with it. And Gretel decided it wasn’t a patch on her brother, but she did it anyway..

Suddenly the door opened, and a woman as old as the hills, who supported herself on crutches, came creeping out. Hansel and Gretel were so terribly frightened that they let fall what they had in their hands. Blaming their poor upbringing, and the destitution they had and how they couldn’t afford the latest fashion

The old woman who was too nice to obnoxious brats who had half eaten her front door, nodded her head, and said: "Oh, you dear children, who has brought you here Do come in, and stay with me. No harm shall happen to you." She took them both by the hand, and led them into her little house. Then good food was set before them, milk and pancakes, with sugar, apples, and nuts, . Afterwards two pretty little beds were covered with clean white linen, and Hansel and Gretel lay down in them, and thought they were in heaven.” An old woman, alone with valuable property, we could steal all we want and be rich.

The old woman who was suffering from glaucoma, and cholesterol and diabetes, and had only built the little house of bread in order that she wouldn’t have need of a doctor wasting the doctors time and resources. Then before the old woman got up, hansel decided to sneak about looking for things to steal, and as he was going into the pantry, the old woman had to get up as she was thirsty, hearing a noise in the pantry, she locked the door. Then she went to see if her guests were safe, and she could only find gretel, and hansels bed hadnt been slept in but there was a smile on gretels face and the smell of sex in the air.. and discovering that hansel was the theif she Then she went to Gretel, shook her till she awoke, and cried: "Get up, you lazy thing, fetch some water, and cook something good for your brother, he is in the stable outside, and as I don’t want to be charged with kidnapping, you will have a good meal and then the police will be called Gretel began to weep bitterly, but it was all in vain, for she was forced to do what the old woman commanded. And now the best food was cooked for poor Hansel, but Gretel got nothing but crab-shells. Every morning the woman crept to the little stable, and cried: "Hansel, stretch out your finger that I may feel if you will soon be fat." Hansel, however, stretched out a little bone to her, and the old woman, who had dim eyes due to her glaucoma, could not see it, and thought it was Hansel's finger, and was astonished that there was no way of fattening him. When four weeks had gone by, and Hansel still remained thin, she was seized with impatience and would not wait any longer. "Now, then, Gretel," she cried to the girl, "stir yourself, and bring some water, he needs a good wash, then he will be turned over to the police " Ah, how the poor little sister did lament when she had to fetch the water, and how her tears did flow down her cheeks! " Dear God, do help us," she cried. "If the wild beasts in the forest had but devoured us, we should at any rate have died together." "Just keep your noise to yourself," said the old woman, "it won't help you at all." Early in the morning, Gretel had to go out and hang up the cauldron with the water, and light the fire. "We will bake first," said the old woman, "I have already heated the oven, and kneaded the dough." She pushed poor Gretel out to the oven, from which flames of fire were already darting. "Creep in," said the witch, "and see if it is properly heated, so that we can put the bread in.", But Gretel saw what she had in mind, getting gretel to actually do some work no chance thought gretel and said: "I do not know how I am to do it; how do I get in?" "Silly goose," said the old woman. "The door is big enough; just look, I can get in myself!" and she crept up and thrust her head into the oven. Then Gretel gave her a push that drove her far into it, and shut the iron door, and fastened the bolt. Oh then she began to howl quite horribly, but Gretel ran away, and the old woman was miserably burnt to death. Making gretel a murderer, but Gretel, however, ran like lightning to Hansel, opened his little stable, and cried: "Hansel, we are saved! The old woman is dead!" Then Hansel sprang like a bird from its cage when the door is opened. How they did rejoice and embrace each other, and dance about and kiss each other! And celebrated how brother and sister in the deep south can do.

And as they had no longer any need to fear her, they went into the womans's house, and in every corner there stood chests full of pearls and jewels all the old womans life savings. "These are far better than pebbles!" said Hansel, and thrust into his pockets whatever could be got in, and Gretel said: "I, too, will take something home with me," and filled her pinafore full. "But now we must be off," said Hansel, "that we may get out before the police discover the old womans body”

When they had walked for two hours, they came to a great stretch of water. "We cannot cross," said Hansel, "I see no foot-plank, and no bridge." "And there is also no ferry," answered Gretel, "but a white duck is swimming there; “
Hansel being the cruel monster he was went and killed the duck by ringing its neck and watching it run about with its head on backwards and he laughed to see it then after they had walked for a short time, the forest seemed to be more and more familiar to them, and at length they saw from afar their father's house. Then they began to run, rushed into the parlor, and threw themselves round their father's neck. The man had not known one happy hour since he had left the children in the forest; the woman, however, was dead murdered by the woodcutter . Gretel emptied her pinafore until pearls and precious stones ran about the room, and Hansel threw one handful after another out of his pocket to add to them.. Then the police caught them for hansel being the moron, had left fingerprints all over the old womans house, and discovering that their father was a murdered, arrested them all for murder, conspiracy to murder, arson, and incest and put them in jail, to await execution, and there they are still, on appeal, costing the tax payers thousands and year.

Sunday, 21 July 2013

Job centre violence

What worries me is as more pressure is put upon job centre staff to sanction people, that these people will be pushed into destitution and will decide there is nothing left to lose and will take it out on the Job centre staff, Like the recent story about the job centre staff member in germany, who was shot and killed because of the treatment of this unemployed person. I know when i go into the job centre i am starting to feel an anger towards the staff due to their treatment of the unemployed. This is creating a whole culture of hatred towards the job centre and staff. A place that is supposed to help you find a job has evolved into a punishment factory.  They blame the unemployed for not working but if employers wont hire them then who is really to blame.